Oh, So Thankful....

My husband is thousands of miles away in a foreign country currently at war with itself, I have been a "single"mom for the past 9 months, homeschooling 3, taking care of an infant, and I'd give anything for a cup of coffee and adult conversation! - but I am the most thankful I have ever been!!!

Needless to say - I miss my hubby something awful! Or maybe it did need to be said...see, if you would have asked me 3 years ago whether I missed my hubby-the answer would have been very different ! Without going into great detail and rehashing stuff that feels so far away its almost like a bad dream...lets just say that our marriage was FAR from perfect! There were times when all I could think about was how fast and how far could I run...I mean really? I could re-name myself...I always liked the name Lisa.... I could just pick up and start somewhere else and who would know? Just to have a second chance seemed so tempting...and that time I would do it right!! (wink)

I can't pinpoint one talk I heard, or which marriage retreat it was, or which piece of advice I took that really changed it all. I only really remember praying daily "Lord, change me and change my marriage. The wine has run out..."

Fast forward now, a few years later, in a different state over a thousand miles(literally) from where we started, and James in Iraq.....Nothing like a a "little" change in your life to wake you up! ( Lord...change is what I prayed for, right?)

I prayed for change and all, but wow! I just didn't think he would have to take him clear around the world to do it!!! This past 9 months I have watched how God has moved in my husbands heart. Making him and leading him into the leader of our home that He desires James to be....and molding me into the serving, help-meet that He desires of me.

What a miracle God has done in my life and in my marriage-it started 7 years ago when we accepted Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior. And the ride ain't over yet! You could never have told either of us this part of the story and have us believe you! To be where we are now in our marriage, with our kids, and with our walks with God? Crazy talk, I tell you!

When I look back at who we were then and how I thought things could and would never change, I am in awe of the complete miracle God has poured out on my family...

When we started, things just weren't moving fast enough for me...couldn't we just profess Christianity and then be immediately changed? Well, yes and no. We desired to change, but needed guidance on how to walk that out. So God, in His infinite wisdom, stuck myself and James in a spiritual "vat", stirred the pot a bit and let it simmer for a long time(that is how you get the best flavor, right?).

And today- I am soooo very in love with James...andI stand so thankful...yes,thankful for the long nights of wondering if we could get through the next week .....thankful for the tears shed on bended knee... and thankful for the cries out to Jesus to just "replace the wine, for we have run out..." Because without those long, heart wrenching moments, I wouldn't know that He still performs miracles...I wouldn't know His powerful grace... I wouldn't know His healing touch and I wouldn't know just how blessed I am ......thank you , Lord, thank you so very much ...